The kind of pain that sits below the heart and just behind the lungs and doesn't feel like it will ever leave

I want to start at the end of Jonah. The great vomited missionary had just forgotten the lesson we love to remember. A whole Nation State, One Hundred Twenty Thousand repentant people brought to their knees at the very first words of GOD. Then after seeing the power of GOD in repentant people, finds himself in a cranky place east of Nineveh. All it took was his withered shad on a hot day for him to wish against his life.

Then these words from GOD.....
"You're troubled by this vine that you did nothing for. But you've forgotton the Thousands of people in town that still don't know right from wrong, shouldn't I be concerned about them?"



I'm trying to speak about emotion beyond a cranky mood. A while ago I said, in a sulky mood "Every time I feel like crap I think about the millions of people that have a hundred more reasons to fell like crap. People who suffer moral evil.......failed marriages, loss of children, abusive relationships, a thousand harmful addiction.... people who suffer Natural Evil ..... famine, disaster, drought, disease and ultimately poverty. Then I feel even more like crap and can't believe my selfish reclusion."

I want to finish this message but right now I need to gather my thoughts.
(2 days break)
Alright I'm back to finish my thoughts.....

Over the past several days GOD has been busting people wide open right next to me. I've been praying for this for a while and I'm glad I'm getting to a lot of heart issues with a couple friends, out here. HURT is basically the big issue that many of them are facing and how to deal with that hurt.

Today I was speaking in a church about the 'drop in' and a lady that was listening said that as soon as I started speaking her hand started hurting. She said that a while ago her hand was cut pretty bad but it healed and it hadn't hurt in a really long time; until I started talking, then she said it was throbbing. She interpreted this as prophecy that while I'm working at the 'drop in' there will be a lot of people that will look fine and feel healed but that the pain will come back.

There's a couple of friends that I've met, in town, that are here with 'sobering up programs', that found their way into alcohol through huge human hurt. I can understand and sympathize (not condone) getting 'hammed' to cover up unexplainable pain (suicide, family violence (stuff that no person should have to live through)). The kind of pain that sits below the heart and just behind the lungs and doesn't feel like it will ever leave. The sort of hurt that's humanly devastating and not just a personally interpreted.

As I said, I can understand getting 'ham faced' when it's covering huge human hurt (death and disillusion). But I can't comprehend 'good time drunks', that have a relatively healthy life but just want to have fun fast; that's just ecstasy gluttony.